The Universal Medicine cult is remarkable for the high rate of relationship and family breakdown among followers, and a survey of its leader’s writings on relationships remove any mystery as to why. Serge Benhayon’s teachings regard all emotion as toxic, ‘love’ as a state of emotionless inertia, relationships as painful and attempts to engage in reasonable discussion as abuse. Esoteric relationship advice encourages narcissistic passive aggression and rejection of those who don’t subscribe to UniMed’s brand of ‘healing’. The fact Esoteric relationships are only possible with fellow self centred, emotionally neutered and paid up members of the cult, serves a dual purpose – consolidating cult membership, and furthering the UniMed death drive – eroding followers’ reasons to live.
Esoteric ‘Connection’ – Emotional neutering
There’s no denying poorly managed emotions can bring us undone; damage mental health, harm relationships and impact physical health. For some of us its our life’s work to learn how to manage them in a way which not only prevents harm, but benefits ourselves and others. Ultimately, emotional connections with others, no matter how imperfect, can be the most deeply enriching, satisfying and healing experiences of our lives.
But not on Planet Serge, where emotions and altruism are toxic, as we’ve seen in a previous post on Esoteric Compassion.
Be well reminded that all disease and illness comes from emotions. (Benhayon, 2007, p. 421)
Sympathy and empathy are both emotions. Emotions are poisonous to our physical body, for they are indulgent energies that help the spirit individualise. (Benhayon, 2011, p. 283)
Ironically, the word ‘connection’ is one of UniMed’s keywords, found throughout UM and its front groups’ promotional material, and used extensively in Benhayon’s ‘meditations’ (covert hypnosis). In audio of one lecture, Serge used the words ‘connect’ and ‘reconnect’ sixteen times in less than two minutes. However, his use of the word is typical of SergeSpeak where conventional meaning is subverted in order to confuse and manipulate. Esoteric ‘connection’ is an instruction to turn inward and emotionally disconnect from others. Just as healthy emotional, spiritual and intellectual engagement with others is described as ‘separation’, which Benhayon believes runs counter to connecting with one’s ‘self’.
His teachings on emotion appear to be a fundamentalist distortion of the Eastern philosophical concept of detachment, traditionally a method for controlling emotions in order to reduce suffering. Again, typical of Benhayon, he co-opts a complex and difficult ideology and takes it to rigid extremes, this time equating control of emotions with eliminating them altogether. Detachment, when poorly understood and enacted, can amount to callousness and a relinquishing of responsibility in relationships. For self centred individuals, detachment is a pseudo spiritual excuse for disregarding the feelings of others and avoiding acting in their best interests.
Emotions stop us from being who we truly are. Feel the fact and you will avoid them at all costs. (Benhayon, 2011, p.296)
The soul has no emotions. (Benhayon, 2009, p.300)
Compassion is the ability to observe, understand and accept. There is not an ounce of emotion in true compassion. (Benhayon, 2011, p. 284)
He makes repression acceptable to followers by endowing it with Godliness, never minding that joy is also an emotion, which by his own definition causes disease.
Love is not emotional; it is an emanating presence that has not one ounce of emotion in it, but the emanating aspect of the joy and harmony that is God. (Benhayon, 2006, p.26)
Emotional engagement is toxic and Esoterically incorrect
Taking it further, Benhayon recommends rejecting emotional engagement with others, not only because it causes disease, but may damage the Esoteric ‘soul’ because it is not living ‘in truth’.
Be well reminded that all disease and illness comes from emotions. These ill states of being can occur as emotions that stem from a karmic cycle, or those which are spontaneously created, or those which are patterned into the body. In all of these cases there are disharmonious flows of energy and thus, such disharmony leads to a dis-eased state within.
From a strict energetic point of view, to absorb life is a poisonous way of being. It creates an existence at best, and does not allow one to truly live. Another’s emotions should not be absorbed into your auric or etheric fields, for such energy will soon become your physiology, pathology and physical remnant. Another’s energy should never ever become your pathological condition, and when this exists, it is because you have absorbed another’s emotions, and thus have allowed those absorbed emotions, which belong to another, to be the energetic pattern in your life. (Note: the relationship of parents as a couple or as individuals, and the child that grows up holding onto that is, having absorbed those ill-conditions and ill-behaviours.)
To absorb another’s emotions is not living in-truth, energetically speaking, nor is it true compassion.
It is a form of existing through sympathy and empathy without once discerning for oneself whether what is experienced is one’s energy to live with or someone else’s to experience only for themselves. Ponder on this. (Benhayon, 2007, pp. 421-2)
Emotional needs are portrayed as weakness.
The separation to self creates the emotional clinging we have to others. This is not union or connection in-truth. It is attachment driven by needs. The need is to fill the emptiness and so we impose on others to give us what we refuse to give to ourselves – self love. (Benhayon, 2007, p.395)
The attitude that emotional needs are a sign of weakness is a documented hallmark of authoritarian personalities. (Volgyes, 1983, pp.23-39). Grandiose sense of self, shallow emotions, incapacity for love and lack of empathy are also narcissistic and sociopathic personality traits common among cult leaders. (Lalich & Tobias, 2006, pp. 62-65) Again, ‘in truth’ love is emotionless, and as loved ones of cult members are well aware, is refused to those outside the cult. Narcissistic self-love, however, is presented as ‘soulful’ and ‘divine’.
Self-love is the key to the foundation of the Saviour Light that is with the inner-heart of every man. If you do not have self-love you cannot embody the ‘light of the soul’. The soul is pure love. It is the Christ, the living body of love that is God in the love form. If the physical apparatus, the unit of expression here on Earth, cannot have true love in it, it cannot embody God’s form of love, known as the soul aspect. (Benhayon, 2007, p. 396)
Self-love appears to be an infantile Esoteric remedy for those unable to cope with not getting their own way in relationships. The diminished capacity to communicate and compromise and the insistence on getting one’s way naturally results in a state of ‘hurt’ which Benhayon complains is both unnatural and unbearable, present ‘every split second of the day, everywhere’.
Illness and disease caused by separation in our bodies. For example, if I’m going to be angry I give much more power to my liver than I do to any other organ in my body. The liver will harden me and the reason I’m angry is because I’ve been hurt. My first reaction is to go into sadness because hurt is not part of our human race. It’s unnatural. Even though it exists every day and it happens every minute of the day, every split second of the day, everywhere, it’s still not natural and we know the fact. If you ask your body ‘is it natural to hurt?’ It is not natural to hurt…The only reason we accept hurt is because we have a liver that will harden us and it hardens us so that we don’t feel the constant hurt that is happening everywhere. Benhayon, S., Audio Recording of Esoteric Development Group lecture, 2010.
Loved ones of UM cult followers will recognize the sentiments of the following passage from the same lecture. Not only are followers told they’re in a state of constant ‘hurt’, everyone they meet is ‘a hurt’; disrespecting, loveless and dishonouring them.
Even everyone you meet is already a hurt because they’re coming from a place where they’re not even engaging you. They’re talking to you totally not there. That hurts. That’s a form of disrespect, that’s a form of dishonouring and it’s a lack of love you know another to be in. All of that hurts. How could we survive in society if we are feeling that hurt all the time? We can’t. And what happens to a lot of people that can’t escape that, don’t go hard in the liver – they become oversensitive. They refuse to harden with their liver, so they develop over sensitivities. Benhayon, S. Audio Recording 2010.
Note that the over sensitivity only extends to followers’ self-loving choices and the welfare of the cult. No such sensitivity is allowed for the impact of such narcissism on others. If the group were to engage in authentic healing, they’d assist followers in coming to terms with or overcoming ‘hurt’ by discovering the positive strengths of others, building trust and relating via mature negotiation, healthy boundary setting and compromise. Instead, Benhayon plays on followers’ preciousness and emphasizes victimhood, continuing the manipulation by dishing advice which plays on weaknesses.
You want relationship advice? Deal with your hurts before you seek to bury them in the interactivity of a relationship. You will then truly love simply because you will not be too self-protective to do so. (Benhayon, 2011, p.368)
However, to ‘truly love’ one must nullify emotions such as empathy or compassion. And since such a state is untenable for maintaining healthy relationships, he’s essentially instructing his followers to isolate themselves.
This topic will be discussed in more detail in an upcoming post, but the basic premise of Benhayon’s anti-sex campaign is that women don’t like sex and men only have sex for relief and because they’re suffering identity confusion.
…to do what is truth, your partner then has to deal with the fact that they had sex with you when they had an entity in them because they had alcohol and your kidney energy got drained, but nobody likes that truth, they want to say that is rubbish…hey man I want you to make love to me because I fell in love with you and every time you drink that is not you, yeah you know what, I put up with it for 20 years but the truth is my body doesn’t want that anymore, and women, it takes 20 years for a woman to own up to the fact they don’t enjoy sex. It’s hard for the man to own up to that because he feels rejected and he has to own up to the fact he was only relieving himself, because he doesn’t know who he is because society won’t let him be who he is, because he wants to if he were to be who he really was he’d be far more fragile, sensitive and much more gentle and much less pushing to get there. Audio recording of EDG lecture, 2010.
Single women are not really missing out – most women are only in a relationship because it relieves a need and because they are too afraid of what it would be like, without it. (Benhayon, 2011, p.522)
Yet, the male and female Eso-nuns aren’t in relationships with each other or with Serge to relieve any needs. It’s a financial transaction after all, with a bit of competition to keep it interesting. And they’d all be fine without each other. They’re not afraid to live alone. They prove it every split second of every day by rejecting those who’d rather not ‘invest’ in UM programming, donating their divorce settlements to the cult and moving into group households to live closer to Serge.
The sum total of UniMed indoctrination is a recipe for domestic discord. Loved ones of UniMed cult followers naturally question its benefits. Particularly as they witness the personality changes that result from comprehensive thought reform techniques, healing practices that are damaging to health, the evaporation of intimacy and emotional connection, and the increasing financial and time commitment to a ‘healing’ service that brings about a deterioration in quality of life and relationships.
Previous posts on Esoteric feminism and Esoteric love have examined Benhayon’s archaic and divisive sexism and his cold teachings on interpersonal relationships. In combination with the above coaching in emotional dissociation, followers routinely label those who question UniMed as loveless men, bullies and abusers. UniMed propaganda blogs deny critics the opportunity to discuss misgivings about the group, ask questions or present their side of the story, However, our Have Your Say posts give first hand accounts of the difficulty of living with or relating to a loved one who has become emotionally shut down, paranoid, uncommunicative, obstinate and defensive, yet transfixed with the cult and its leader.
I have watched (my partner) change from a strong, confident and loving person to a shadow of her former self…
I see her fear of me living an ordinary life and bringing that ordinary life into our home. How is a relationship supposed to survive when one of the members believes that their partner drains her kidney energy and brings evil entities to feed off her and her child?
From Herbert Kane:
It’s not easy, it really isn’t, and as had been said on here many times before, it’s heartbreaking to see Serge & UM sit back and allow so many relationships to fail and families break up as a result of his teachings. His use of the words “truth” and love” are truly hypocritical.
Finally, once followers have rejected those who care about them, destroyed their health, drained their savings, done their best to annihilate their emotions, and basked in the Esoteric ‘warmth’ of the ‘fiery’ glacier of emotion free love from their fellow subscribers, they have the consolation of joining ‘Self-Love Affair’ a celebration of hard-hearted narcissistic groupthink and cognitive dissonance marketed under the Esoteric Healing umbrella.
And if that fails to satisfy, it doesn’t matter.
Benhayon, S., A Treatise on Consciousness, UniMed Publishing, Goonellabah, 2007
Benhayon, S., Esoteric Teachings & Revelations, UniMed Publishing, Goonellabah, 2011
Benhayon, S., The Living Sutras of the Hierarchy, UniMed Publishing, Goonellabah, 2009
Benhayon, S., The Way It Is, UniMed Publishing, Goonellabah, 2006
Lalich, J., Tobias, M., Take Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive Relationships, Bay Tree Publishing, Berkeley, 2006
Volgyes, I., “Personality Structure and Change in Communist Systems: Dictatorship and Society in Eastern Europe” in The Cult of Power: Dictators in the Twentieth Century, ed. Joseph Held, Eastern European Monographs, Boulder, 1983.